Раздел: Компьютеры | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 22:56:51 | Оценка: 2.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Муж запаролил комп, чтобы я с вами здесь не сидела. Ну, включила я. Нажала на подсказку. Там написано: «Люда». Ну я ввела пароль: «Дура». И вот я с вами.
Раздел: Про евреев | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 22:46:16 | Оценка: Нет | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Боря, почему у тебя ребёнок не засыпает?
- Не понимаю, Фирочка! Трясу погремушкой, а он не спит.
- Шо ты делаешь? Ты портишь ребёнку слух! Тряси копилку!
Раздел: Про учебу | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 21:53:14 | Оценка: 1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Идёт урок математики в начальной школе. Учительница разбирает итоги контрольной работы, которая была накануне. Все затихли, слушают.
– Отдельно хочу спросить у Вовы. Когда я проверяла твою работу, то увидела в ней, что ошибки почему-то совпадают с теми, которые сделала твоя соседка Верочка. Может, объяснишь?
– Да что же тут сложного, Марья Ивановна. Ведь мою соседку и меня учит одна учительница – вы!
Раздел: Про евреев | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 21:45:17 | Оценка: 5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Больница.
- Сестра, утку...
На соседней койке Рабинович приходит в сознание:
- И мне кусочек...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 21:39:48 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Молодец сынок, что все понял и прекратил истерику.
- Нет, мамочка, я еще не закончил, просто решил передохнуть.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 21:37:36 | Оценка: 4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Маленький Андрюша спрашивает у Ирочки:
- А ты выйдешь за меня замуж, когда мы вырастем?
- Нет!
- Почему?
- Потому, что в нашей семье не принято выходить за чужих, у нас все женятся на своих. Вот смотри, моя мама вышла замуж за моего папу, бабушка за дедушку, а прабабушка за прадедушку.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 21:33:29 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Пожилая пара решила заняться cекcом.
- Сема, надень гандон!
- Ты что, боишься забеременеть?!
- Нет - боюсь подхватить сальмонеллу, я слыхала она водится в старых яйцах.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2019-01-18 14:02:30 | Оценка: 2.33 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Слыхал, вчера после матча Неймар, раздавая автографы, случайно подписал контракт с ярославским Шинником...
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