Раздел: Политические | Опубликован: 2016-02-05 20:01:46 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Один историк другому:
- Как думаешь, какое будущее у нас будет лет через 20?
- Ты что! Я даже не знаю, какое через это время будет прошлое.
Раздел: Про пьяниц | Опубликован: 2016-02-04 20:08:06 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
А ведь жизнь после 50-ти только начинается! - подумал я и налил себе ещё 50.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2016-02-04 07:50:21 | Оценка: 3.29 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Подруга говорит, купила эту жвачку для похудения - и три размера за месяц скинула...
- Жвалы склеились?
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2016-02-04 07:44:23 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Пап, если шкуру животного чем-то наполнить, то получится - чучело?
Отец, глянув на жену в шубе:
- Верно, сынок, чучело.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2016-02-04 07:38:14 | Оценка: 3.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Сын:
- Пап, откуда у тебя синяк под глазом?
Отец:
- У тебя их будет два, если еще хоть раз твои подружки в моей машине трусы забудут!!!
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2016-02-03 20:44:09 | Оценка: 2.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
В машине едут три крупных начальника, обсуждают, где их жены любят отдыхать летом.
- Моя обычно летит на Канары.
- А моя любит Юрмалу.
- Я свою отправляю в Сочи.
Спрашивают у водителя:
- Вася, а ты свою куда?
- Да не, я её сам тp@хаю.
Раздел: Политические | Опубликован: 2016-02-02 20:41:42 | Оценка: 4.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Правительство заявило, что оснований для повышения цен нет, поэтому цены будут повышать без основания.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2016-02-02 17:07:36 | Оценка: 4.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Развелась жена с мужем и нашла себе другого. Встречаются они все на вечеринке, старый муж обращается к новому:
- Ну, как тебе по старой дороге кататься?
Новый ему с ходу:
- Да, нормально! Первые три сантиметра немного заезжены, а остальные пятнадцать - как новенькие.
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