Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 18:21:45 | Оценка: 2.78 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Муж - жене:
- Может, собаку завести?
- Да ты, чмо, даже жену завести не можешь...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 18:21:26 | Оценка: 3.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Какие блондинки произносят больше всего глупостей в течение дня?
- Те, которые встают раньше, а ложатся позже.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 18:20:40 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Женщина жалуется врачу:
- Муж совершенно потерял интерес к сексу.
Врач дает ей таблетки и говорит:
- Когда захотите, растворите одну таблетку в супе и дайте мужу - все будет в порядке.
На следующий день женщина приходит снова и говорит:
- Спасибо, доктор! Я ему от жадности не одну, а две таблетки в суп бросила, так он меня прямо за обедом на столе и... того.
- Ой, вам, наверное, было неудобно?
- Да, ужасно! Мы в этот ресторан больше не пойдем!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 18:01:07 | Оценка: 2.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Я не требую какого-то особого ухода. Можете уходить как обычно.
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 17:59:28 | Оценка: 3.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Настоящий мужчина идет к врачу только тогда, когда обломок копья в спине начинает мешать спать.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-28 17:57:04 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Как ты относишься к людям, которые бормочут что-то себе под нос, а потом не повторяют?
- Что?
- Ничего.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-27 16:30:14 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Забегает муж домой, хватает жену за руку, несётся в спальню, бросает на кровать...
Жена в шоке, за 20 лет такого не было. Муж заваливается к ней, накрывает их одеялом с головой и говорит:
- Смотри! Часы купил...светятся!!!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-04-27 15:50:24 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Почему вы много успеваете и относитесь ко всему оптимистично?
- А я просто ни с кем не спорю.
- Но это же невозможно!
- Ну невозможно, так невозможно.
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