Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-03-13 09:36:40 | Оценка: 2.67 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Сварливая хозяйка уволила прислугу. Когда служанка уже уходила, она кинула три монеты собаке.
- Что это значит? - закричала хозяйка.
- Она их заслужила. За то время, что я у вас работала, она всегда вылизывала ваши тарелки.
Раздел: Про пьяниц | Опубликован: 2014-03-13 09:35:51 | Оценка: 2.8 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Когда Кате было 3 года, она бегала голышом по пляжу. Сейчас ей уже 30, но две бутылки шампанского помогают вернутся в детство.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-03-13 09:34:44 | Оценка: 2.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Что ты со своей девушкой разошелся?
- Полная дура она. Знала же, у меня пена для бритья заканчивается и носки дырявые. А на 23 февраля подарила ноутбук.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-03-13 09:32:48 | Оценка: 3.29 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
На севере Швеции у местных водителей существует давняя традиция мигать фарами, предупреждая о том, что на дороге олень! У нас в России тоже есть такая традиция...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-03-12 23:49:06 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Шерлок Холмс и доктор Ватсон идут по лесу. Холмс показывает Ватсону кучу дерьма:
- Видите, Ватсон – здесь мы с сэром Генри впервые встретили
собаку Баскервилей.
- Холмс, а почему же куча только одна?
- Потому что я, в отличие от сэра Генри, успел снять штаны!
Раздел: Про учебу | Опубликован: 2014-03-12 23:25:13 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
В институте профессор спрашивает у студента:
- Почему вы опоздали на занятия?
- Я ночью лег около двух.
- В следующий раз ложитесь около одной.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2014-03-12 22:49:11 | Оценка: 2.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
На приеме у гинеколога:
- Скажите,а сколько у Вас мужчин было?
- Четыре.
- Не очень много!
- Да уж...денек не удался...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-03-12 21:17:06 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Разгадываю сканворд. Дочь сидит рядом,чай пьёт..Я в пол голоса:
- Слово из пяти букв, содержит буквы п, з, д, а?
Дочь:
- Запад!
- Хм.. Точно... Дай ка ластик!
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©ZSV
