Раздел: Медицинские | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:24:11 | Оценка: 3.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Я ему говорю… говорю…, а он, как глухой! Понимаете? Он меня не слышит! А я говорю…говорю…, а он… глухой! Я ему снова говорю, а он…
- Да, не каждому дано такое счастье, - бормочет психотерапевт...
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:23:30 | Оценка: 2.7 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Девушка, можно...
- Можно!
- Ха! Девушка, но почему вы даже не дослушали меня? Вдруг я что-нибудь похабное хотел предложить?
- Вы стали бы первым за последние семь лет!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:23:11 | Оценка: 3.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
У дембелей первые пару дней на гражданке не работает часть мозга, отвечающая за деление девушек на красивых - некрасивых.
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:22:28 | Оценка: 3.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Паренек почувствовал неладное, когда гопники с чужого района, в который он поехал провожать свою девушку, сказали за его спиной: - Этого трогать не надо, он с Машкой, смелый видно мужик.
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:22:09 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Отойдите-ка все от стола, я ему сейчас дубиной по башке перешибу!
- Да, Петров, вы, на моей памяти, самый целеустремленный анестезиолог...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:21:50 | Оценка: 3.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Сегодня услышал, как моя соседка долго уговаривала своего кота слезть с дерева. Последняя ее фраза: - Ну тогда, не ори! Вей гнездо и ложись спать!
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:21:31 | Оценка: 2.8 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Диpектоp авиакомпании выговаривает командиру самолета:
- Я бы хотел, чтобы впредь вы выбирали слова, с которыми вы обращаетесь к пассажирам.
- А что случилось?
- Hа днях, заходя на посадку, вы сказали пассажирам в микрофон: "Прежде, чем мы приземлимся, я хотел бы воспользоваться случаем и попрощаться со всеми".
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2014-11-24 20:21:09 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Жена в отпуске, брюки все грязные, купил джинсы, весь вечер укорачивал!
- Хм, молодец! А чего в шортах пришёл?
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©ZSV
