Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 18:18:50 | Оценка: 2.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Параллельная парковка - это когда ты запарковался, и тебе совершенно параллельно, куда встанут остальные.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 18:18:23 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Летом и на новогодние праздники в Москве пробки гораздо меньше, так как большинство москвичей уезжает на родину.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 18:12:47 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Невеста спрашивает жениха:
- Ты куда поступил?
- В медицинский.
- Вот хорошо! А я - в ветеринарный... Когда поженимся, будем лечить друг друга...
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 08:44:10 | Оценка: 3.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Милый, мне идет это платье?
- Если я скажу правду, ты не обидишься?
- Нет.
- Ты - дура и готовить не умеешь.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 08:42:54 | Оценка: 1.7 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Алло, здравствуйте, скажите, это прачечная?
- Да, это прачечная, здравствуйте.
Раздел: Медицинские | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 08:38:54 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Приходит физик–теоретик к врачу и говорит:
- доктор, у меня член 640 нанометров…
- что, такой маленький?
- нет такой красный…
Раздел: Детские | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 08:37:14 | Оценка: 2.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Идет мужик, видит - подкова на дороге. Поднял, перевернул - а там лошадь.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2015-02-25 08:36:23 | Оценка: 3.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Воскресная проповедь в церкви:
- Сегодня, дети мои, восславим Пресвятую Деву. Я хочу, чтобы вы все прочувствовали ее величие и чистоту. Я решил, что лучше всего это получится на конкретном примере.
Вот среди вас во втором ряду сидит, как всегда скромно опустив глаза, наша Долорес. Мы все ее хорошо знаем. Сколько добрых дел совершила она! А как она помогает своим родителям и вообще всем старикам нашей деревни! Она не пропускает ни одной мессы!
Хоть она и молода, и доходы ее невелики, но она всегда найдет монеты, чтобы опустить в кружку для пожертвований! А ее скромность, целомудренность и кроткий нрав известны всем! Встань, Долорес, пусть все увидят тебя! Но, дети мои, по сравнению с пресвятой девой она просто шл..!
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