Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2018-12-07 08:45:17 | Оценка: 3.67 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Рецепт для лысых: Намазать голову мёдом, подождать три дня, затем сильно хлопнуть в ладоши - мухи улетят, а лапки останутся.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:28:06 | Оценка: 3.9 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Встречаются 3 подруги: одна жена уже лет десять, другая - любовница, третья - только невеста. Обсудили своих мужиков и решили устроить эксперимент: одеть кожаное черное белье, сексуальные чулки с поясом, высокие каблуки, маску на глаза и так встретить своих любимых. Через неделю опять встречаются.
Невеста рассказывает:
- Он пришел домой, я встретила его в чулках, в маске на высоких каблуках... Он набросился на меня, сказал, что я любовь его жизни и мы занимались любовью всю ночь!
Любовница рассказывает:
- Я пришла к нему в офис, закрыла дверь, распахнула плащ, а там кожаное белье, маска, каблуки... Он ничего не сказал, но мы 5 часов без перерыва занимались любовью!
Жена рассказывает:
- Муж пришел с работы, я открыла дверь в кожаном черном белье, сексуальных чулках и маске... Он посмотрел и спросил: "Чё на ужин, Бэтмен?"
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:24:27 | Оценка: 4.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Милый, объясни мне, кто такая "Катя анал" у тебя в телефоне?
- А-а-а... Это Екатерина Павловна из отдела аналитики.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:21:11 | Оценка: 2.67 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Маш, а твой-то чем занимается?
- Да в полиции он.
- И что, нравится ему там?
- Не знаю. Его только час назад забрали.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:13:05 | Оценка: 4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Хорошая новость: ваш клип посмотрели два миллиона человек. Плохая новость: они зашли туда по ссылке "посмотрите на эту дуру".
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:11:42 | Оценка: 2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Сколько друзей у меня было, сколько родственников... В гости друг к другу ходили, общались. Всё, никого нет, всех забрала она, проклятая.
- Водка?
- Дача!
Раздел: Про учебу | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 10:10:44 | Оценка: 4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Ну как сессия?
- Матан почти на пять сдал, трех баллов не хватило…
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2018-12-06 09:24:17 | Оценка: 3.83 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Лежу я в стогу сена и жопой чувствую, что вилы нужно хранить как-то по-другому...
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