Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:40:24 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Невеста была настолько некрасивой, что для её выкупа пришлось нанять опытного менеджера по продажам.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:40:05 | Оценка: 3.6 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Илья Муромец рассказывает, как он сражался с Лернейской гидрой:
- Отрубаю ей голову – на её месте четыре вырастают. Четыре отрубаю – три вырастают. Три отрубаю – семь вырастают.
- Ну и чё?
- Полчаса рубил – никакой закономерности!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:39:32 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Мы что, так и будем стоять в углу бара, пить виски и обсуждать, какие все страшные вокруг?
- Ну да, мы же пришли сюда повеселиться.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:39:17 | Оценка: 2.71 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- У тебя зарплата хорошая?
- На хлеб и икру хватает.
- Красную или чёрную?
- Кабачковую!!!
Раздел: Детские | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:39:02 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Сын (5 лет) выдал жене:
- Мама, а знаешь, есть такая фигура - нигдеугольник.
- Круг что ли?
- Ну да.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-23 19:38:19 | Оценка: 3.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Подружка жалуется:
- иногда мне кажется, что я - место под той известной скалой в Спарте. Всех самых некрасивых и больных мальчиков скидывают ко мне..
Раздел: Политические | Опубликован: 2015-03-22 12:00:16 | Оценка: 4.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Барак Обама рассказывает Ангеле Меркель:
- У меня есть три кнопки: зелёная, жёлтая и красная. Нажимаю зелёную и нет Европы. Нажимаю жёлтую и нет Китая. Нажимаю красную и нет России.
Меркель подумала, после чего ответила:
- У моей бабушки было три унитаза: золотой, серебряный и фаянсовый; но когда в Берлин вошли русские танки, она ОБОСРАЛАСЬ В КОРИДОРЕ.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-22 09:26:45 | Оценка: 3.33 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
В управление ГАИ заглянул мужичок, спрашивает в окошко:
- А где можно получить права на управление танком или бронетранспортером?
- Господи, да катайтесь так, кто ж вас остановит?
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