Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:42:33 | Оценка: 2.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Ребят, пожалуйста, не закапывайте меня.
- Леха, все, перекур, со мной картошка разговаривает.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:42:14 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Мама разговаривает с дочкой: - Какая же ты все-таки вредная...
- Все претензии к производителям!
Раздел: Медицинские | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:40:48 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
В аптеке:
- Здравствуйте, мне два грамма кокаина и потискать котёнка.
- Извините, но мы не продаём сильные наркотики.
- Тогда только кокаин.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:40:32 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Покупатель в магазине у Абрама:
- Скажите, а у вас есть желтая ткань?
Абрам показывает рулон ткани. Покупатель с улыбкой:
- Так это же черная.
Абрам выносит со склада еще два рулона. Покупатель:
- Отличное качество, жаль только, что один рулон красный, а другой синий!!
Абрам: - Знаете, вот чтобы совсем желтая, таки нет.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:39:48 | Оценка: 2.63 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Через 40 лет:
- Дедушка, мне кажется, что нам будет весьма нелегко понимать друг друга.
- Ахах, лол. Я хз, мне норм.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:39:25 | Оценка: 3.75 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
В магазин матрёшек требуются старший менеджер, менеджер, младший менеджер, ассистент младшего менеджера…
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:39:11 | Оценка: 2.5 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Настройщик пианино настраивает инструмент в комнате отдыха психбольницы.
В комнату заходит мужчина и включает телевизор. Орущий телевизор мешает настройщику работать, но он решает не спорить, а просто подходит к телевизору и молча его выключает. Мужчина странно смотрит на настройщика и снова включает телевизор. Так повторяется несколько раз. Первым не выдерживает настройщик:
- Послушайте, я пытаюсь настроить пианино и для этого мне нужна тишина.
Тогда мужчина рассмеялся и сказал:
- Я телевизионный мастер и пришел починить телевизор. Я думал, что вы сумасшедший и просто стучите по клавишам.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-03-12 18:38:54 | Оценка: 3.67 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Как новый год встретишь, так его и проведешь.
- Поэтому ты забрался под одеялко?
- Да.
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