Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:14:26 | Оценка: 3.7 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
В фильмах заботливые жены всегда улыбаются, когда муж наливает к борщу рюмку водки из запотевшего графина.
Перепробовал семь жен.
Что-то здесь не так...
Раздел: Про пьяниц | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:13:50 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Хотелось пива. Решили кинуть жребий. Если монета опуститься орлом - пойду я, если решкой - пойдет он. Если монета зависнет в воздухе - пойдем оба.
Пошли оба. Монета застряла в люстре.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:13:34 | Оценка: 3.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Оторвалась у меня пуговица на брюках. Подхожу к жене с намерением вежливо попросить её пришить. Молча, с улыбкой, протягиваю ей брюки и пуговицу.
Жена в шутку говорит:
- А ты представь себе, что ты в армии, и жены рядом нет...
- Та-а-ак! Слышь, салага! А ну, пришей дедушке пуговицу!
Раздел: Про пьяниц | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:13:18 | Оценка: 3.4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Россия - страна, в которой надо оправдываться, если не пьешь.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:13:01 | Оценка: 3.2 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Муж решил проверить, изменяет ему жена или нет.
Сказал, что уезжает в командировку, а сам спрятался в кладовке.
Ночью из спальни жены доносится: «Боком, боком, ножку, вот эту, так хорошо…» Подождал мужик немного и входит в комнату. Смотрит - жена спит, а пианино исчезло…
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:12:47 | Оценка: 3.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Алло, это "World Global IT Development International"?
- (шёпотом): Да…
- А почему шёпотом?
- Я на математике.
Раздел: Компьютеры | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:11:48 | Оценка: 4.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Мне кажется, начальник на меня смотрит и думает:
«Это устройство может работать быстрее».
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-04-27 22:11:33 | Оценка: 3.83 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- У тебя был кто-нибудь до меня?
- Сегодня?
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