Раздел: Медицинские | Опубликован: 2015-06-10 19:15:40 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Вы же врач? Подскажите, как вылечить глистов?
- А что с ними? Приболели?
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-06-10 19:15:24 | Оценка: 3.11 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
- Бог.
- Что, Адам?
- Возьми у меня еще ребро, но сделай на этот раз что-то более адекватное.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2015-06-10 08:46:46 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Поцелуй меня в знак примирения.
- ?
- Да,да именно туда.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-06-10 08:38:51 | Оценка: 3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Голодный бродяга стучится в дверь таверны под названием "Георг и
дракон".
- Что вам угодно? - спрашивает хозяйка.
- Я не ел три дня...
- Иди отсюда, попрошайка! - рявкает хозяйка.
Бродяга задумывается, потом опять стучится:
- А нельзя ли мне видеть Георга?
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-06-09 22:28:22 | Оценка: 2.8 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Русский подъезжает к немцу на мерседесе.
-Спорим на 600 евро что я крышу с пистолета прострелю.
Немец: -Дану, как можно мерсу в крышу с пистолета! Ты врёшь!
Русский: -Спорим!
Немец: -Давай! (с ухмылкой) Готовь деньги!
Русский залазит в машину и делает 3 выстрела в крышу.
Немец отдавая деньги: -Ну вы русские и безжалостные.
-Ну ещё бы!
Едет. Заезжает в сервис.
-Сколько люк на мерена установить будет стоить?
-200 евро.
-Давай, делай. (себе на ум. -Ну вот люк хотел сделать давно да и ещё 400 евро в плюсе!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-06-09 21:51:43 | Оценка: 3.4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Штирлиц заходит в Элефант с шашкой и кричит немцам: -ПОРУБЛЮ ГАДЫ!!! Немцы скинулись по рублю для Штирлица и он убежал.
Раздел: Для взрослых | Опубликован: 2015-06-09 21:36:25 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Двое молодых охотников пошли в лес. Только пришли а тут бац! МЕДВЕДЬ!!! Ну они ружья со страху бросили и ноги в руки. Один на сосну медведь за ним лезет. Второй возвращается к оружию, БАХ! У медведя левое яйцо в сторону, БАХ! у медведя правое яйцо в сторону, он от боли ревет но лезет только ещё злея стал. Ну тот целится снова БАХ и отстреливает к чёрту последнею причендалину. Тот с дерева орёт: -В ГОЛОВУ! В ГОЛОВУ СТРЕЛЯЙ ПРИДУРОК! ОН МЕНЯ НЕ ТРАХАТЬ ЛЕЗЕТ!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-06-09 21:13:17 | Оценка: 3.4 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5 | Не цензура!
Пока девушки первые не начнут приводить меня в бар, чтобы напоить за свой счет и потом развести меня на ceкc у себя дома, при этом делая постоянные комплименты моим, например, ногам, ни о каком равенстве полов не может быть и речи. Уж простите, накипело...
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