Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 20:05:29 | Оценка: 3.75 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Купила лотерейный билет, - сказала она мужу. Если я выиграю, куплю себе норковую шубку.
- А если не выиграешь?
- Тогда ты мне её купишь!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 20:05:13 | Оценка: 2.75 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
У супружеской пары двенадцать детей. Муж приходит после работы домой уставший, а дома - шум, крик, драки...
Жена жалуется ему: - Видишь, что они вытворяют? Самый задиристый из них - Коля.
- Коля? - удивляется муж. Оказывается у нас есть еще и Коля?
Раздел: Медицинские | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 20:04:36 | Оценка: 2.7 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
В поликлинике: - Что у вас болит?
- Голова.
- Вот вам уколы
- В голову?
- Нет. В задницу.
-... скажите какая связь?!
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 20:04:21 | Оценка: 3.3 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Женская общага... Одна девушка собирается на свидание. Две другие ей помагают... Одна говорит: - Давай 50 для храбрости!
Другая с сомненьем: - Может быть 100 для глупости?
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 20:04:05 | Оценка: 2.25 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Кабинет Обамы. Заходит Хилари Клинтон и видит что на стене висит портрет Чапаева. Она спрашивает: - Это кто?
Обама: - Это русские подарили... Не знаю кто это, но белых он тоже не любил..
Раздел: Черный юмор | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 15:31:59 | Оценка: 3.1 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Официант лежит в операционной, истекает кровью. В операционную заходит врач.
- Доктор, помогите, я умираю...
- Этот столик не обслуживается!
Раздел: Детские | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 15:31:17 | Оценка: 3.22 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
Девочка-первоклассница пришла домой вечером первого сентября.
- Как тебе понравилось в школе? - спросила мама.
- Пустая трата времени, мам. Читать я не умею, писать - тоже, а разговаривать они мне там не разрешают.
Раздел: Разные | Опубликован: 2015-05-20 15:27:48 | Оценка: 2.7 | Оценить: 1 2 3 4 5
- Помнишь мою квартиру? Прикинь, я вчера в ней трамвай запустил, рейс по всем комнатам!
- Блин, в натуре, круто!
- Да... Круто. Только вот когда в туалет спешу - все равно такси ловить приходится...
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